Archive of ‘Bad Parent’ category

That Woman Is a Disaster

And by that woman I mean me. I’ve found that being a working mom is often times just like living in a movie.  Because the minute you think you have it all together is right when the rug is about to be pulled out from under you – just like the misguided star of any […] Read more…

So You’re Saying My Kid Is Not Going To Be The Next Pelé?

When my oldest son was five years old he absolutely dominated on his soccer team.  He was like the Michael Jordan-Tom Brady-Tiger Woods (pre-sex scandal) of elementary school age soccer.  And it just tickled me.  I’m not gonna lie; I had total mama-bear pride. So naturally when he made the jump up to club soccer […] Read more…

Giving Up Vacation Gladly

Before I had children, vacations for me generally meant lying on a tropical beach, baking in the sun (my twenty-year-old self was kinda honey badger about wrinkles – I really didn’t give a…), drinking strawberry daiquiris (my twenty-year-old self was also kinda honey badger about counting calories), and doing absolutely positively nothing.  Nada.  Not a […] Read more…

Technology Free(ish) Sundays

Last Saturday, as many of you know, my husband and I had an epic parenting fail when the lovely family night we had planned for our children turned into a scene from The Exorcist.  To keep my sanity I am going to pretend that evil forces invaded my children’s bodies and caused them to act […] Read more…

Keeping Our Kids In Line

My dad used the brush or belt.  I have a friend whose mother used a wooden spoon.  I have even see my cousin get it with a shoe – it really came down to convenience at that point.  But back in the day when seat belts were optional, smoking was ubiquitous, and kids played out […] Read more…

Opting Out Of Birthday Insanity

It took me eight years but I’ve finally thrown in the towel. I can’t do it anymore. I simply can’t plan another over the top, cartoon/video game/activity themed child’s birthday party. I’m not renting another bounce-house or petting zoo. I’m not stressing over finding the perfect party favors. No more agonizing over whether to get […] Read more…

Does Teaching My Boys To Be Chivalrous Mean I Am A Feminist Sell-Out?

I am a feminist.  If a feminist is someone who believes women and men can share in responsibilities and opportunities regardless of sex then yes I am a feminist.  If by feminist you have some vision of a man-hating woman then we are not on the same page.  I have two sons, a husband, and […] Read more…

Talking To My Young Kids About Drugs

Two things happened last week that made me realize I needed to talk to my six and eight-year-old sons about drugs. The first happened while standing in the grocery store checkout line.  My six-year-old turned to me and said, “Justin Bieber is in prison for drugs.”   Panicked I tried to play it cool and […] Read more…

Sleeping Arrangement Insanity

I sleep in utter and complete chaos.  Every morning I wake up drenched with sweat, slightly claustrophobic, and curled into an impossibly small ball on my California King sized bed wedged in between my husband on my left, my eight year old son on the right and our one-hundred-thirty pound rescue dog who was thirty-five […] Read more…

Slowing It Down For The Sake Of My Sons

My friend Susan doesn’t call me “Crazy Lady Nicole” without good reason.  I am insane.  I lead a jam packed existence and I like it that way. I thrive on challenge.  I crave challenge at work, and the challenge of fitting in time with friends, family, community commitments, a body drenching work out, learning a new skill, meeting […] Read more…

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