Today finally realized a months long dream of mine. I’ve bought the website: FatUglyOldAuPairs.com
Giggle if you must, but ladies, I have a vision. A vision we can all share and rejoice in. Today I have taken the first step to educate today’s sitters as to proper etiquette, attire, and demeanor when watching our children.
I cannot take sole credit for this miraculous new website. As with most strokes of genius it started with tragedy that was turned into something beautiful through the wit and wisdom of brilliant women – and a few glasses of wine.
It all started innocently enough when my friend shared pictures of the au pairs who were applying for the position she had posted with our wine – er, book – club. To say that these women were beautiful would be doing them a disservice. It was like looking through head shots of supermodels. So here is rule #1 on the newly launched website: tone it down, bitches! For real. because even if you find the most self-assured woman (which my friend just so happens to be) she undoubtedly has a gaggle of snarky friends who simply won’t allow Au Pair Barbie to move in with her family. Truly, marriage is hard enough, we do not need the younger, hotter version of us moving in – the is not Sister Wives.
So aspiring au pairs please pick up some reading glasses, throw in some low lights, take off the makeup, and then send in your picture for consideration.
The next big lesson the website will feature is that your job is in fact a job. Please don’t apply for the position because you are a free spirit and need to “keep your schedule loose.” When you are late for your job then us working moms are guess what – bingo – late for our jobs! If you take off a month to get married, please don’t call up a day before you are due back to work and ask if we really need you back so soon. Because the answer is yes. Perhaps you can cut and paste this last sentence onto a sheet of actual paper and tape it to your mirror so you see it every morning. So here’s rule #2: punctuality and commitment are deal breakers.
On the flip side, we don’t need you to be the Nazi Nanny. Now I appreciate a good boundary as much as the next girl. But there is such a thing as being too strict. If my kid has allergies and her nose is runny I don’t want you calling me every day to come take care of her and then tell me what medications I should be giving her and then insinuating a week from now when her nose is still runny (because it is allergy season) that I am somehow a bad mom for not over medicating my kid.
which brings us to rule #3: if any of us mothers want your advice we will most certainly ask for it but until that time comes – and it never might – just zip it.
I don’t want to overwhelm you but you get the idea. I again have to thank my little seven pound eight ounce Baby Jesus with the golden curly hair and the blue tuxedo that none of these situations were ever anything I experienced. Though unfortunately, each scenario is real and heart breaking to watch your friends endure. it’s only by some miracle that between my parents and the sitters I’ve been blessed with, I’ve never had one single complaint. In fact I am thinking of recruiting my mom, Miss Barbara, Miss Heather, and Miss Janice to give some lessons I can post on the website. Just not sure they’d be crazy about the idea of being the spoke people for a website called FatOldUglyAuPairs.com. I will need to work on that.
If you like my blog you’ll love my book. Buy The Working Mommy’s Manual on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Working-Mommys-Manual-Nicole-Corning/dp/0615637418/ref=cm_sw_em_r_dp_6ZRcqb0QFT7P8_tt
 |
For laughter and inspiration read my book The Working Mommy's Manual, available on Amazon.
Buy Online Now!
Jaleesa Salo
April 18, 2013 at 2:17 pm (11 years ago)You are my inspiration, I have few web logs and rarely run out from post :). “Fiat justitia et pereat mundus.Let justice be done, though the world perish.” by Ferdinand I.
stopki z gwintem
April 18, 2013 at 4:01 pm (11 years ago)You become chip in framer meet facing matched upon chosen blogs harlot web. it will power puff this site!
tanie ksiazki biala podlaska
April 18, 2013 at 4:53 pm (11 years ago)You made some first rate points there. I seemed on the internet for the issue and located most people will associate with with your website.
Home improvement
April 18, 2013 at 5:37 pm (11 years ago)You completed several nice points there. I did a search on the theme and found most people will consent with your blog.
zlobek warszawa
April 18, 2013 at 6:06 pm (11 years ago)The later turn better self interpret enterpriser blog, alter contemplation that me doesnt debunk inner man alike much evenly this paired. ego paltry, better self doubt not number one was my judicature pending define, at best alter ego actually deliberation youd getter aught spicy till nay. All her hear is architect convex touching whining term either that ethical self could frontage supposing ego werent too on the move digging accentuation.
bransoletki srebro
April 18, 2013 at 6:07 pm (11 years ago)Pfefferkorn@gmail.com
gclub
April 18, 2013 at 7:37 pm (11 years ago)Wow! This can be one particular of the most useful blogs We’ve ever arrive across on this subject. Basically Fantastic. I’m also a specialist in this topic therefore I can understand your hard work.
win the lottery
April 18, 2013 at 8:31 pm (11 years ago)Hi are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and create my own. Do you need any coding expertise to make your own blog? Any help would be really appreciated!
bip gmina
April 18, 2013 at 8:58 pm (11 years ago)Along with everything which appears to be developing within this particular area, your opinions are actually quite radical. Even so, I beg your pardon, but I can not give credence to your whole strategy, all be it exhilarating none the less. It looks to us that your comments are not completely rationalized and in actuality you are generally your self not completely confident of the argument. In any case I did take pleasure in examining it.
consultant
April 18, 2013 at 9:11 pm (11 years ago)I like this weblog very much, Its a really nice office to read and receive information. “What is called genius is the abundance of life and health.” by Henry David Thoreau.
Automotive
April 18, 2013 at 9:27 pm (11 years ago)Hi, i think that i saw you visited my blog so i came to “return the favor”.I am trying to find things to improve my web site!I suppose its ok to use some of your ideas!!
Alia Reksten
April 18, 2013 at 10:02 pm (11 years ago)You will discover some interest-grabbing closing dates on this posting but I don’t know if I see all of them middle to center. There can be some validity nonetheless I’ll require sustain opinion till I glance into it further. Excellent post , thanks and we desire far more! Extra to FeedBurner as well
sprzedaz samochodow osobowych
April 18, 2013 at 10:10 pm (11 years ago)Hey! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with SEO? I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good results. If you know of any please share. Many thanks!
czartery samolotow
April 18, 2013 at 10:19 pm (11 years ago)hello there and thank you for your info – I’ve definitely picked up something new from right here. I did however expertise several technical issues using this website, as I experienced to reload the website lots of times previous to I could get it to load correctly. I had been wondering if your hosting is OK? Not that I’m complaining, but sluggish loading instances times will often affect your placement in google and can damage your quality score if ads and marketing with Adwords. Well I am adding this RSS to my email and could look out for a lot more of your respective fascinating content. Ensure that you update this again very soon..
Temika Frothingham
April 18, 2013 at 10:56 pm (11 years ago)Anyone fundamentally help to produce seriously posts I would condition. This would be the initial time I frequented your website webpage and as a result much? I shocked with all the investigation you made to develop this particular publish amazing. Amazing job!
wywietrzaki
April 18, 2013 at 11:09 pm (11 years ago)I have been exploring for a bit for any high quality articles or blog posts on this sort of area . Exploring in Yahoo I at last stumbled upon this web site. Reading this information So i am happy to convey that I’ve a very good uncanny feeling I discovered exactly what I needed. I most certainly will make sure to do not forget this site and give it a look regularly.
rajstopy wolford
April 18, 2013 at 11:23 pm (11 years ago)Howdy! I’m at work browsing your blog from my new iphone 4! Just wanted to say I love reading your blog and look forward to all your posts! Keep up the outstanding work!
Find Hematologist
April 18, 2013 at 11:27 pm (11 years ago)Most sports teams have both a physician and a physiotherapist. What are the differences between the two, in roles, education, and salary?.
Johna Burgh
April 18, 2013 at 11:52 pm (11 years ago)surely like your website website but you have to check the spelling on numerous within your posts. A lot of of them are rife with spelling problems and I uncover it very bothersome to inform the reality nevertheless I’ll certainly occur rear yet again.
pianino warszawa
April 19, 2013 at 12:43 am (11 years ago)Incredible! This blog looks exactly like my old one! It’s on a completely different topic but it has pretty much the same layout and design. Wonderful choice of colors!
acne cyst
April 19, 2013 at 1:00 am (11 years ago)This can be a fantastic blog and i desire to pay a visit to this each and every day on the week ,
Genevive Pluid
April 19, 2013 at 1:02 am (11 years ago)center on that item, and another set of “neighbors” will come into view, allowing you to navigate around exploring by similar artists, songs, or users. Speaking of users,
cynk sklep
April 19, 2013 at 1:15 am (11 years ago)The following time I read a weblog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I mean, I know it was my option to learn, however I actually thought youd have one thing attention-grabbing to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about one thing that you may fix when you werent too busy in search of attention.
deska szalówkowa
April 19, 2013 at 1:22 am (11 years ago)I’m not that much of a internet reader to be honest but your blogs really nice, keep it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your website to come back in the future. All the best
filmowanie wesel
April 19, 2013 at 1:29 am (11 years ago)I went over this site and I believe you have a lot of great information, bookmarked (:.
Kenya Ramez
April 19, 2013 at 3:28 am (11 years ago)I’ve become familiar with a number of positive things below. Undoubtedly worth book-marking regarding returning to. I ponder how a great deal test you place to make the kind of magnificent educational site.
tanie pokoje zielona gora
April 19, 2013 at 3:39 am (11 years ago)Once I initially commented I clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a remark is added I get 4 emails with the identical comment. Is there any way you possibly can remove me from that service? Thanks!
Harris Garrington
April 19, 2013 at 4:58 am (11 years ago)Thanks for the points you have provided here. One more thing I would like to express is that computer memory needs generally go up along with other advances in the engineering. For instance, when new generations of processor chips are brought to the market, there’s usually a related increase in the scale demands of all personal computer memory and also hard drive room. This is because the software program operated by simply these processors will inevitably rise in power to use the new technological know-how.
Paymundo Review
April 19, 2013 at 5:30 am (11 years ago)After I originally left a comment I seem to have clicked on the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now whenever a comment is added I receive four emails with the exact same comment. Perhaps there is a way you can remove me from that service? Cheers!
zasilacze led
April 19, 2013 at 5:53 am (11 years ago)You need enter into contriver go forward-looking wedded upon cream blogs alert weave. ethical self strength recommend this site!
design schmuck
April 19, 2013 at 6:25 am (11 years ago)I’ve been exploring for a little bit for any high-quality articles or blog posts on this kind of area . Exploring in Yahoo I at last stumbled upon this site. Reading this information So i am happy to convey that I have a very good uncanny feeling I discovered just what I needed. I most certainly will make certain to do not forget this site and give it a look regularly.
distribution farouk
April 19, 2013 at 7:07 am (11 years ago)I’m extremely impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you modify it yourself? Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it is rare to see a nice blog like this one these days..
the hormone cure naturally gottfried pdf download
April 19, 2013 at 7:47 am (11 years ago)Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.
akb48 コンサート
April 19, 2013 at 8:28 am (11 years ago)Good day very nice website!! Guy .. Excellent .. Wonderful .. I’ll bookmark your site and take the feeds additionallyI am glad to find numerous useful information here in the post, we’d like develop extra strategies on this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .
putzgewebe
April 19, 2013 at 8:44 am (11 years ago)Hello there! This is kind of off topic but I need some advice from an established blog. Is it hard to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick. I’m thinking about setting up my own but I’m not sure where to start. Do you have any ideas or suggestions? Thank you
dating polish women
April 19, 2013 at 9:28 am (11 years ago)I’m impressed, I need to say. Really rarely do I encounter a blog that’s each educative and entertaining, and let me let you know, you have got hit the nail on the head. Your thought is excellent; the issue is something that not sufficient persons are talking intelligently about. I’m very completely happy that I stumbled across this in my search for one thing relating to this.
czyszczenie dywanow warszawa
April 19, 2013 at 9:57 am (11 years ago)My brother recommended I might like this web site. He was entirely right. This post truly made my day. You can not imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!
Classic Car
April 19, 2013 at 10:50 am (11 years ago)What i do not understood is in truth how you are now not really a lot more neatly-liked than you might be now. You’re very intelligent. You already know therefore significantly with regards to this topic, produced me personally believe it from a lot of numerous angles. Its like men and women don’t seem to be fascinated until it is something to do with Lady gaga! Your personal stuffs excellent. All the time handle it up!
breastfeeding t-shirt
April 19, 2013 at 11:09 am (11 years ago)Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an really long comment but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t show up. Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyways, just wanted to say wonderful blog!
snowboard tanio
April 19, 2013 at 11:13 am (11 years ago)After study a number of of the weblog posts on your web site now, and I actually like your means of blogging. I bookmarked it to my bookmark web site listing and will probably be checking again soon. Pls try my web site as properly and let me know what you think.
hyip investment plans
April 19, 2013 at 11:17 am (11 years ago)Good web site! I really love how it is simple on my eyes and the data are well written. I’m wondering how I could be notified whenever a new post has been made. I have subscribed to your feed which must do the trick! Have a nice day!
.
April 19, 2013 at 11:36 am (11 years ago)Real fantastic information can be found on web blog . “Wealth may be an ancient thing, for it means power, it means leisure, it means liberty.” by James Russell Lowell.
Virgie Lapage
April 19, 2013 at 11:40 am (11 years ago)Simply a smiling visitant here to share the love (:, btw great style and design .
Bambi Mabry
April 19, 2013 at 12:24 pm (11 years ago)When I originally commented I clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now every time a comment is added I get 4 emails using the same comment. Is there any way you may take away me from that service? Thanks!
custom office furniture
April 19, 2013 at 1:04 pm (11 years ago)I visited various sites but the audio feature for audio songs current at this site is in fact fabulous.
Blade and Soul Gold
April 19, 2013 at 1:22 pm (11 years ago)Zune and iPod: Most people compare the Zune to the Touch, but after seeing how slim and surprisingly small and light it is, I consider it to be a rather unique hybrid that combines qualities of both the Touch and the Nano. It’s very colorful and lovely OLED screen is slightly smaller than the touch screen, but the player itself feels quite a bit smaller and lighter. It weighs about 2/3 as much, and is noticeably smaller in width and height, while being just a hair thicker.
Nkp
April 19, 2013 at 1:23 pm (11 years ago)I just wanted to type a simple comment so as to express gratitude to you for all of the unique tips you are placing here. My extensive internet search has at the end been rewarded with reputable ideas to share with my neighbours. I ‘d admit that we site visitors actually are really blessed to exist in a decent network with very many brilliant individuals with useful tactics. I feel quite fortunate to have discovered your entire web page and look forward to some more exciting times reading here. Thank you again for everything.
Removing Malware
April 19, 2013 at 1:58 pm (11 years ago)Find out information by surfing to this blog which identifies antimalware and also that google redirect virus. Categories -: Computing
local singles
April 19, 2013 at 2:33 pm (11 years ago)Hi there, i read your blog occasionally and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot of spam feedback? If so how do you prevent it, any plugin or anything you can recommend? I get so much lately it’s driving me insane so any help is very much appreciated.
zygor guides
April 19, 2013 at 2:58 pm (11 years ago)you are a legitimate very good webmaster. The web page loading speed is amazing. It seems that you are doing any exceptional trick. Likewise, The details are masterpiece. you have done an outstanding job on that subject!
zestaw xenon
April 19, 2013 at 4:37 pm (11 years ago)Your reference system is valueble moving inner man. Thanks!…
MBT Shoes
April 19, 2013 at 5:01 pm (11 years ago)During a visit to Korea made the startling discovery that walking barefoot over paddy fields alleviated his back pain. Possibly these shoes are produced rich in specifications generating by using quality supplies. Wearing them in the street will help you turn out to be the focus.
Kyong S. P. Daugherty-Peacock
April 19, 2013 at 6:35 pm (11 years ago)as I website possessor I conceive the subject material here is rattling wonderful, appreciate it for your efforts.
sexcam
April 19, 2013 at 8:24 pm (11 years ago)Excellent seeking internet web-site. Precisely what theme are you currently presently creating utilization of?
co2 laser marking machine
April 19, 2013 at 9:43 pm (11 years ago)I抦 honored to obtain a call from a friend as he identified the important tips shared on your site. Browsing your blog post is a real excellent experience. Many thanks for taking into consideration readers at all like me, and I wish you the best of achievements as being a professional domain.
kim kardashian music video
April 19, 2013 at 11:25 pm (11 years ago)This website is seriously a walk-through it actually is definitely the data you wished with this and didn’t know who should. Glimpse right here, and you’ll undoubtedly uncover it.
commercial roofing los angeles
April 20, 2013 at 1:17 am (11 years ago)My favourite Budgeting app hands down is YNAB You Need A Budget.
Tricia Hemm
April 20, 2013 at 3:06 am (11 years ago)But wanna say that this is very helpful , Thanks for taking your time to write this.
Dorian Daughtrey
April 20, 2013 at 4:01 am (11 years ago)Incredible, amazing blog layout! How long do you think you’re blogging and site-building with regard to? you’ve made running a blog search simple. The overall look of your respective web site is impressive, not to say the information!
Saul Sodomka
April 20, 2013 at 4:57 am (11 years ago)It is the best time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy. I have read this post and if I could I desire to suggest you some interesting things or advice. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article. I want to read more things about it!
sexcamfun.org
April 20, 2013 at 5:29 am (11 years ago)assisted living is great in case you got a number of people and a home that cares pretty much to its occupants**
chat mit girl
April 20, 2013 at 5:54 am (11 years ago)He is simply not exactly the same Paul Walker, you might recall from his earlier films.
Funeral services
April 20, 2013 at 6:49 am (11 years ago)The top and clear News and why it means a lot.
camsex-www.camchat-flirt.com
April 20, 2013 at 7:58 am (11 years ago)Commonly I do not comment in your weblog. I’m additional with the silent sort but I wonder, is this wordpress since I’m pondering of switching my own blog from blogspot to wordpress.
Lelah Test
April 20, 2013 at 9:39 am (11 years ago)You could definitely see your enthusiasm within the paintings you write. The arena hopes for even more passionate writers such as you who are not afraid to say how they believe. At all times go after your heart.
ventricular arrhythmia treatment
April 20, 2013 at 9:50 am (11 years ago)How can I protect my son from Commotio Cordis?
Loren Tippin
April 20, 2013 at 11:37 am (11 years ago)I like the helpful info you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your weblog and check again here frequently. I’m quite sure I will learn a lot of new stuff right here! Best of luck for the next!
reputation protect
April 20, 2013 at 12:53 pm (11 years ago)Thanks for your write-up on the vacation industry. We would also like to include that if you are one senior taking into consideration traveling, it truly is absolutely vital that you buy traveling insurance for golden-agers. When traveling, retirees are at greatest risk of experiencing a medical emergency. Getting the right insurance coverage package in your age group can protect your health and provide you with peace of mind.